Pregnancy and an ED

Okay, so the title may be a little misleading. I once had an ED. I believe that I will always be in the mindset of an ED even though I might not be starving myself... I use to obsess over my weight and how my body looks. I know what you're thinking. Every girl/woman obsesses over body image. Well, not to the extent that I did. BDD is a real thing. People could tell me they noticed I was losing weight or that they thought I looked good and it didn't matter. I didn't feel good about myself. That's a summarized version of an ED without the gory details (puking, your hair falling out, etc.)

So, since I've been pregnant the whole weight thing has been hard. I know that I'm supposed to gain weight. But that doesn't mean its an easy pill to swallow. Every time I go see my doctor and I look at the scale I say to myself, "really?" and I wonder how long it will take me to lose that weight. I know other people have lost the weight but what if I can't. What do I do? These are the things I'm left wondering at the end of the day and that's sad.

Being okay with gaining weight will never happen for me. The fact that I'm not fitting into prepregnancy clothes scares me. I am proud to say that I have eaten, all meals. I refuse to punish my child because I have a problem. Because I have a twisted reality. That isn't his fault. I have to put myself aside and do what's right for my baby.

First lesson as a parent: check.

Until next time.

Pregnancy Week 20 & catch up.

Well, here's the few weeks that I didn't post. There wasn't really anything super noteworthy about those weeks so ehh. I was lazy and didn't post them. I'm pregnant alright!!

 

 

So there's those.. and here's a really crazy picture of where the baby was balled up in my belly. It was crazy! I had gotten up to go potty and came back to lay down to this..

Okay so now on to this week!

 

• How far along?: 20 weeks.
• Milestones: had an u/s today and everything looked perfect & baby is still a boy (:
• Baby is the size of a: banana
• Total weight gain/loss: 17 lbs gained
• The Bump: is here
  
• Symptoms: None besides my crazy back pain
• Food Cravings: fresh fruit & panera mac & cheese
• Anything Making Me Queasy or Sick: eating too much or not enough
• Sleep: I sleep through the night, but once I wake up for any reason...I'm half asleep for the rest of the time.
  
• What I miss: Not missing anything currently.
  
• Weddings Rings On or Off: On
• Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yep!
• Gender: BOY
  
• Movement: This guy is moving ALL THE TIME
  
• Maternity Clothes: a few tops and pants
• Labor Signs: N/A
• Best Moment of the Week: Daddy got to feel a kick.
  
• What I’m excited about/looking forward to: ehhh not much honestly...

 Just look how handsome he is already. Be still, my heart <3

 

Until next time.

 

Pregnancy week 15 & Gender Reveal!

• How far along?: 15 weeks!
• Milestones: we know gender!
• Baby is the size of a: p e a r 
• Total weight gain/loss: 5+
• The Bump: There's definitely a bump!
  
• Symptoms: I'm feeling pretty good these days
• Food Cravings: fresh fruit & panera mac & cheese
• Anything Making Me Queasy or Sick: eating too much
• Sleep: I sleep through the night, but once I wake up for any reason...I'm half asleep for the rest of the time.
  
• What I miss: Not missing anything currently.
  
• Weddings Rings On or Off: On
• Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yep!
• Gender: BOY
  
• Movement: I feel like I might have felt a flutter...but I don't know.
  
• Maternity Clothes: I have a pair of jeans and a top
• Labor Signs: N/A
• Best Moment of the Week: finding out what baby clark is!
  
• What I’m excited about/looking forward to: shopping (:

 

SO! Because I am crazy impatient I talked my mom into buying us a gender determination ultrasound. I was super nervous all day. When we got there we had almost the whole family there. It was PACKED. We went back to the room for the appointment and the tech took some pictures and everybody chatted about what they thought the baby was. Baby was being really difficult at first. Not in the correct position, then crossing it's legs. I was getting worried that we wouldn't find out what baby was. As soon as my friends and family finished tallying their votes the tech had found what she was looking for. We learned that we will be having a baby boy join our family in September. My stepmom had bought babys first outfit as a surprise!

 

Can't wait for baby to be here. I love you so much already.

Until next time.

Pregnancy Week 14

 

• How far along?: 14 weeks!
• Milestones: 
• Baby is the size of a: l e m o n
• Total weight gain/loss: none
• The Bump: There's definitely a bump!
  
• Symptoms: I'm feeling pretty good these days
• Food Cravings: fresh fruit & panera mac & cheese
• Anything Making Me Queasy or Sick: Nothing recently, I'll just feel sick randomly.
• Sleep: I sleep through the night, but once I wake up for any reason...I'm half asleep for the rest of the time.
  
• What I miss: Not missing anything currently.
  
• Weddings Rings On or Off: On
• Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yep!
• Gender: Don't know
  
• Movement: Besides what I've seen on a monitor, nothing.
  
• Maternity Clothes: I have a pair of jeans and a top
• Labor Signs: N/A
• Best Moment of the Week: went to another appointment with my momma. We also went to panera after & I made an appointment for a gender determination ultrasound.
  
• What I’m excited about/looking forward to: MONDAY 31 WE WILL KNOW WHAT GENDER BABY CLARK IS!!

 

Until next time.

Pregnancy Week 13

• How far along?: 13 weeks!
• Milestones: We are in the second trimester! Baby Clark now has fingerprints!
• Baby is the size of a: p e a c h 
• Total weight gain/loss: none
• The Bump: Okay, now I'm thinking this might be a bump. Tummy is definitely harder than before
  
• Symptoms: Still have some acne issues, still tired, and have had some chest pains?
• Food Cravings: None recently
• Anything Making Me Queasy or Sick: Kendall's driving..seriously every time I'm in his car and he's driving I feel sick.
• Sleep: I sleep through the night, but once I wake up for any reason...I'm half asleep for the rest of the time.
  
• What I miss: Not missing anything currently.
  
• Weddings Rings On or Off: On
• Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yep!
• Gender: Don't know
  
• Movement: Besides what I've seen on a monitor, nothing.
  
• Maternity Clothes: I have a pair of jeans and a top
• Labor Signs: N/A
• Best Moment of the Week: had an ultrascreen test & got a lot of pictures (: ALSO my best friend had her bridal shower which was fun!
  
• What I’m excited about/looking forward to: my next dr appointment and I want my belly to be bigger!! 

 

 

Until next time.

Pregnancy Week 12

Okay so actually I'm 12+3 days but I was busy and didn't have enough time to find someone to spray paint my "chalkboard" (I'll explain why that is in quotations..) so I'm posting my week 12 update today. 

 

I know it looks kind of lame... I was anxious to get it done so the writing isn't as fancy as I would have liked and there aren't really enough decorations on it but it got the job done (: 

When I got home I tweaked it a little bit...

 

This is a little more fancy. I guess. 

• How far along?: 12 weeks!
• Milestones: Baby Clark is developing reflexes and the placenta has fully developed.
• Baby is the size of a: l i m e
• Total weight gain/loss: none
• The Bump: I'm thinking its bloat. My stomach was never really flat but its certainly protruding a little bit. I'd like to say it's a bump. Sadly, I think it's bloat.
  
• Symptoms: exhaustion...is that a symptom? acne and bloat
• Food Cravings:My cravings are very sporadic. Just a few days ago I really wanted a corn dog and crab legs. Sometimes I really really want gushers.
• Anything Making Me Queasy or Sick: Kendall's driving..seriously every time I'm in his car and he's driving I feel sick.
• Sleep: I sleep through the night, but once I wake up for any reason...I'm half asleep for the rest of the night.
  
• What I miss: Angry orchards haaa
  
• Weddings Rings On or Off: On
• Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yep!
• Gender: Don't know
  
• Movement: Besides what I've seen on a monitor nothing.
  
• Maternity Clothes: I have a pair of jeans and a top
• Labor Signs: N/A
• Best Moment of the Week: going to BINGO with my sister for her 18th birthday (:
  
• What I’m excited about/looking forward to:  I have an ultrascreen test on Thursday. Just another excuse to see baby!

 Okay now to discuss my chalkboard. I really wanted to do a chalkboard tracker. However, buying a new chalkboard and at the size I wanted one was going to be expensive. My first idea was to go to the thrift store find some big painting and spray paint over it. But with the local lack of thrift stores that was actually more difficult than it was worth. 

SO! I headed into Walmart, picked up a trifold poster and chalkboard spray paint. I cut the two sides off the trifold and painted the middle. Total cost of my "chalkboard?" 7 bucks. It's that easy folks.

Until next time.

Let's play catch up...

Okay. So many things have happened since my last post... let's play a little game of catch up.

1. The blog got a face lift... ya like??

2. Kendall and I went to Disney World!..in December. Here's some pictures

 

We had a great time. I'm already anxious for the next trip (:

3. WE ARE PREGNANT! 

Baby Clark is due September 20th! I will be doing weekly pregnancy posts starting at my twelfth week. I already feel like it's a boy and that makes me nervous because I feel like I will have a hard time dressing boys. We are very excited. I've only had a bit of morning sickness. Today I had an ultrasound and I saw the baby moving on the screen. It was crazy, baby Clark looked like it was stretching. I was cracking up. If anyone knows of any good pregnancy blogs link them below (:

Here is our social media pregnancy announcement.^^ The only thing I can say that is really driving me crazy is I seem to be getting Restless Leg Syndrome. It makes it so difficult to fall asleep :(

Until next time,
xoxo